"D (Deployment) Day"

Brian's deployment on the USS Nassau began two weeks ago, on January 18, 2010. Family members were able to board the ship the morning of his departure, which I didn't realize is a rare opportunity. Even though we've been on the ship before for a tour, it was nice being able to walk him all the way onto the ship and for the girls to see this is where he'd be for the next 7 months--not that they understand exactly how long that is.

After spending about an hour together, we said our goodbyes slightly before we were forced to, just to end the feeling of impending loss. I think I held it together pretty well, as I usually like to--despite the fact that I'm a sympathetic crier and there were many blubbering people surrounding us.

But I was surprised by the sudden lonely, sad feeling that swelled as I walked through the gangway on my way off the ship--alone and holding both tiny girls' hands, tears streaming down my face. Never before had we left the ship without Brian and it just didn't feel right. Luckily, the cold wind whipping down the pier between the ships crossed my face and dried my tears, slapping some sense back into me. I keep telling myself about the many other military spouses who experience deployments, some many more than we'll have to experience, so we, too, will get through this temporary situation...which hopefully is bettering the world, especially since the ship was diverted to Haiti to help with earthquake relief. So, I wish him fare winds and following seas, and lots of prayers.